Covering Annandale, Bailey's Crossroads, Lincolnia, and Seven Corners in Fairfax County, Virginia

Health & Wellness: Life lessons from a personal trainer

Rachel Martin

By Rachel Martin

The owner of Connection Wellness in Annandale, Rachel Martin, contributes a periodic column on health and wellness issues. Rachel is an IMPACT Life Coach, and a Certified Personal Trainer.

I believe it was Malcolm Gladwell who popularized the idea that it takes roughly 10,000 hours of practice to achieve mastery in any field.

If that’s true, then over the past 13 years, I’ve been incredibly fortunate to log more than 27,000 hours working as a personal trainer – nearly three times that benchmark.

And while I still consider myself a student – constantly learning and evolving – those hours have taught me some powerful life lessons I feel compelled to share.

Why share them now? Because I want to inspire you into action.

I recently heard something from Ryan Leak, the transformational speaker and author, that really stuck with me:

“Life is hard either way, so choose the difficult.

  • Waking up early to work out is hard. But so is waking up every day feeling exhausted and unhealthy.
  • Having tough conversations is hard. So is living with resentment.
  • Putting yourself out there is hard. So is wondering what could’ve been.
  • Growth is hard, but regret is harder.

You don’t get to skip difficult, but you do get to decide which kind of difficult you’re going to live with.”

So today, I’m choosing to share five lessons I’ve learned through years of sweat, setbacks, breakthroughs, and quiet moments. My hope is that one of them sparks something in you – to get up, to show up, and to keep going in any area of your life.

(1) Something is always better than nothing  – and something every day is better than some things on some days.

This may not sound groundbreaking, but I’ve witnessed the power of this truth over and over again. Most people think they need to go all in to see results. But the majority of my clients – and myself included – make the most progress when we aim for 60-70 percent of our full capacity, consistently.

If you’re capable of 10,000 steps a day, aim for 6,000. If you can work out for an hour, start with 20 minutes.

Lower your expectations, and then meet them consistently. That builds momentum. Momentum builds confidence. Confidence leads to greater action.

Action Step: Think of an area of your life where you’d like to see improvement – your health, relationships, finances, or spiritual well-being.
Now ask: What is the SMALLEST step I can take today toward that goal? Then repeat.

(2) Perfect is the enemy of progress.

If you’ve ever trained with me, you might think I’m a perfectionist. I care deeply about form, technique, and keeping people injury-free. But early in my career, I thought more knowledge = better coaching.

What I’ve learned is that too much focus on perfection can actually paralyze progress.

It’s like trying to teach a kindergartener calculus before they can count to ten. You have to meet people where they are – and that includes yourself.

Action Step: Pay attention to your self-talk. Are you demanding perfection, or are you encouraging progress?
Ask yourself: Am I treating this like a journey or a performance?

(3) Everyone has a story you know nothing about.

One of the most meaningful parts of being a trainer is forming real connections. When someone trusts you with their health, you move past small talk quickly.

Over the years, I’ve learned that everyone is carrying something you don’t see.

I remember an employee who suddenly blew up during a conversation about scheduling. It was out of character and intense. Instead of reacting with judgment, I stayed calm and asked a few curious, non-defensive questions.

Eventually, he shared he was in the middle of a brutal custody battle. His frustration wasn’t about work – it had just found its way there. Because I met the moment with compassion, not confrontation, he later apologized, and we both moved forward.

Action Step: Think of someone who regularly gets under your skin.
Now ask yourself: What’s a curious, compassionate question I could ask to better understand their story? Build connection, not competition.

Related story: Health & Wellness – Nature walks

(4) Our stories live in our bodies.

The stories we’ve lived – and the ones we keep telling ourselves – don’t just stay in our minds. They show up in our posture, pain, and patterns.

Tight hips. Chronic back pain. Tension in the neck or jaw. Sometimes, these aren’t just physical. They’re emotional. Your body remembers what your mind tries to ignore.

I used to think every ache or dysfunction needed a physical solution. But I’ve learned that sometimes, true healing requires emotional work: It could be grief that hasn’t been expressed, financial stress that keeps you on edge, or low self-worth that affects how you move through the world.

Action Step: Take 30 minutes to reflect in writing.

Ask yourself:

  • Are there areas of my life where I feel unstable or ungrounded?
  • What does self-worth mean to me and do I treat myself with that level of respect?
  • When did I feel most at ease in my body this week, and what helped me get there?

(5) Awareness is fast and exciting. Change is slow and boring.

We’re living in the age of instant answers. Want to know the weather? Ask Google. Curious about an actor’s dating history? You’ll have your answer in seconds.

The same goes for health advice. We can learn anything at the tap of a screen. And I’ll be honest: I’m often searching for the next way to improve my health or help my clients.

But at some point, I had to ask myself: Am I consuming more than I’m applying?

The world is loud with advice: “Buy this.” “Do these 5 exercises.” “Try this new method.”

But wisdom isn’t in learning more. It’s in living what you already know.

Information is input. Journaling, moving, or resting is output. Without the output, we’re just overstimulated and under-integrated.

Action Step: Pick one “boring” habit you’ve been avoiding – something you know supports your health. It could be five minutes of stretching, prepping veggies, turning off your phone by 9:30 p.m.

Set a 10-day streak goal. Track it daily, on a sticky note, calendar, or app. Don’t wait for it to feel exciting. Just show up.

Then reflect: How do I feel after 10 days of consistent action – no drama, just discipline?

These lessons didn’t arrive all at once. They’ve been gathered quietly over years – through failure, effort, conversations, and showing up when I didn’t want to.

I hope one of lessons meets you where you are today. And more than that – I hope it inspires you to take one small, meaningful step forward.

One response to “Health & Wellness: Life lessons from a personal trainer

  1. Great article, Rachel! For those who don’t know, Rachel has been volunteering to share her training tips with the coaches at Mason District Little League over the last few years too. We are lucky to have her in our community!

Leave a Reply to Brian Johnson Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *