Sexual assault victim wants pool board to take preventive action to protect children
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| The Glen Forest pool |
It has taken years for Bailey’s
Crossroads resident Irene Xenos to come to terms with a sexual assault incident
at the Glen Forest Community Pool decades ago.
Crossroads resident Irene Xenos to come to terms with a sexual assault incident
at the Glen Forest Community Pool decades ago.
She continues to be disturbed,
however, by the fact that her attacker has not been banned from the pool, still
has a membership, and apparently still goes there unaccompanied.
however, by the fact that her attacker has not been banned from the pool, still
has a membership, and apparently still goes there unaccompanied.
Because the man is mentally
challenged, Xenos doesn’t want him punished or even expelled from the pool. She
does want the pool board to require that he have a chaperone; be alert to possible incidents; and educate children,
parents, and lifeguards about inappropriate behavior and signs that a child might
be a victim.
challenged, Xenos doesn’t want him punished or even expelled from the pool. She
does want the pool board to require that he have a chaperone; be alert to possible incidents; and educate children,
parents, and lifeguards about inappropriate behavior and signs that a child might
be a victim.
The pool board has not taken any
action, and both the current president and the board’s attorney,
Yama Shansab, of the Reston-based firm, Ferguson Walton & Shansab, declined
to comment.
action, and both the current president and the board’s attorney,
Yama Shansab, of the Reston-based firm, Ferguson Walton & Shansab, declined
to comment.
The incident happened in 1997 when
Xenos was 11. She usually went to the Glen Forest pool with an older brother and her
grandfather. The attacker, who was in his early
30s at the time, wanted to be around the kids, she says. “I felt bad for him
because he was mentally challenged.”
Xenos was 11. She usually went to the Glen Forest pool with an older brother and her
grandfather. The attacker, who was in his early
30s at the time, wanted to be around the kids, she says. “I felt bad for him
because he was mentally challenged.”
“We were playing in the pool, racing
each other, normal things,” she recalls. “At some point, out of the blue, he
dove down and grabbed my foot and used it to pleasure himself.”
each other, normal things,” she recalls. “At some point, out of the blue, he
dove down and grabbed my foot and used it to pleasure himself.”
“It was weird. I didn’t understand
it,” she says. It wasn’t just a one-time incident, though; it went on everyday
for about a month. Finally, when she told him to stop, “it took all the courage
in the world.”
it,” she says. It wasn’t just a one-time incident, though; it went on everyday
for about a month. Finally, when she told him to stop, “it took all the courage
in the world.”
“It was my nature to not tell
anyone,” she says. After all, this was in the 1990s, way before the #MeToo movement and before children were educated about sexual harassment.
anyone,” she says. After all, this was in the 1990s, way before the #MeToo movement and before children were educated about sexual harassment.
She reported the incidents to
members of the Glen Forest pool board three times, in 2009, 2014, and 2018. In
2009, Helen Chapman, then the president of the pool board promised to bring it
up at a pool board meeting, but apparently nothing came of it. Subsequent pool board members never followed up either.
members of the Glen Forest pool board three times, in 2009, 2014, and 2018. In
2009, Helen Chapman, then the president of the pool board promised to bring it
up at a pool board meeting, but apparently nothing came of it. Subsequent pool board members never followed up either.
Xenos didn’t report the incident
to the police until 2009, when she was told the clock had run out on
retroactive police action for what had been a misdemeanor in 1997. Aggravated sexual battery involving a victim under age 13 is now
considered a felony.
to the police until 2009, when she was told the clock had run out on
retroactive police action for what had been a misdemeanor in 1997. Aggravated sexual battery involving a victim under age 13 is now
considered a felony.
Xenos’ lawyer, Jesse
Binnall of the Alexandria-based law firm Harvey & Binnall, says it’s up to
a prosecutor whether to file charges for a crime committed decades
ago. For a civil lawsuit, though, there’s a statute of limitations of five
years.
Binnall of the Alexandria-based law firm Harvey & Binnall, says it’s up to
a prosecutor whether to file charges for a crime committed decades
ago. For a civil lawsuit, though, there’s a statute of limitations of five
years.
Years after the incidents, Xenos
began to realize that the attacker “kind of knew what he was doing,” even
though she thinks he has the mental age of child. That’s because he chose a
victim who was by herself, rather than in a group.
began to realize that the attacker “kind of knew what he was doing,” even
though she thinks he has the mental age of child. That’s because he chose a
victim who was by herself, rather than in a group.
At one point, she says, a pool
board member tried to defend the attacker by calling him “a boy in a man’s
body.”
board member tried to defend the attacker by calling him “a boy in a man’s
body.”
While Binnall acknowledges that people with mental
disabilities have certain protections under the Americans with Disabilities
Act, “that doesn’t mean we have to put children at risk. If you have epilepsy,
for example, you can’t drive. We can’t take the risk they’re going to hurt
people.”
disabilities have certain protections under the Americans with Disabilities
Act, “that doesn’t mean we have to put children at risk. If you have epilepsy,
for example, you can’t drive. We can’t take the risk they’re going to hurt
people.”
When she spoke about the incidents
with a friend when they were in high school, the friend told her that she’d
been warned by her mother to stay away from that man. “That struck me,” Xenos
says. “That tells me that everyone knew what was going on” but their response
was to avoid him.
with a friend when they were in high school, the friend told her that she’d
been warned by her mother to stay away from that man. “That struck me,” Xenos
says. “That tells me that everyone knew what was going on” but their response
was to avoid him.
“What she wants is for the pool board to do its job and
protect the children in that community,” says Binnall. The perpetrator still
has a membership to the pool, and the pool board hasn’t agreed to restrict his
access. “As a result, our fear is that this is going to happen again.”
protect the children in that community,” says Binnall. The perpetrator still
has a membership to the pool, and the pool board hasn’t agreed to restrict his
access. “As a result, our fear is that this is going to happen again.”
The last time Xenos saw him the man who had assaulted her, it was the pool in 2015 “There was a young girl sitting on a deck chair and he
high-fived her foot,” she says. That set off alarm bells in her mind. While
Xenos believes kids today are more aware of inappropriate behavior and more
likely to report it, they should be explicitly warned about this
individual.
high-fived her foot,” she says. That set off alarm bells in her mind. While
Xenos believes kids today are more aware of inappropriate behavior and more
likely to report it, they should be explicitly warned about this
individual.
She feels responsible that her
reluctance to speak out earlier might have led to other girls being victims. By
getting the story out now, Xenos and her lawyer hope that if there are other
victims, they will come forward.
reluctance to speak out earlier might have led to other girls being victims. By
getting the story out now, Xenos and her lawyer hope that if there are other
victims, they will come forward.
“I still feel bad for the guy,” she
says. “I don’t want him to go to jail.”
says. “I don’t want him to go to jail.”
Thanks Irene. This is uncomfortable and hard to read about, but it's something that needs to be said for the benefit of all. I think what I've learned is that these types of experiences need to be reported right away.
Thank you for the reply. I definitely agree and wish I had reported it sooner. Alas, I did not, so this is my latest effort to try to get the community to be aware since the law does not really allow the police to get involved easily and the pool board would rather not deal with unpleasant things it seems.
I will add one more thing here. I do not want anyone who has been through this and hesitated to report or never gotten to reporting to feel guilty. There are a lot of factors that shape someone's decision to report or not report. For me, I was 11 years old. That does not change the fact that I wish I had reported sooner, but the bigger issue here is that adults need to act like adults, whether than means not molesting a child, properly supervising children, or responding to situations like these with more than silent refusal to act.
Irene, I'm sure I know who you're talking about. I felt uneasy whenever he's been at the pool, because he's so interested in children, and I always watched him carefully. I'm so sorry you went through this.
I assumed because the other adults at the pool were fairly nonchalant about him, and many seemed to know him, that he'd proven himself a non-threat. I'm sad to hear that that's not the case.
I am going to ask my kids if they ever had any uncomfortable experiences at the pool after reading about yours. Best wishes, and thank you for coming forward.
Irene, you’re a very brave girl and thank you for speaking out. I hope this inhuman act didn’t change the way you live your life. Please keep your head up and wish you all the best.